I do volunteer work with a group who I am not going to name here (primarily because I want to continue volunteering and there's an off chance someone who is important might read this). Several weeks ago, I found out that they were planning a holiday party. I was very excited to get to meet some of the other volunteers, maybe get to do some networking and generally just hanging out with people who I share an interest with. I even ordered a very special gift for the gift exchange.
Before I left tonight, I was feeling a little anxious. After all, I was walking into a situation where there would be a ton of people I don't know. But, I pulled out the hot rollers, dressed up and prepared to go enjoy myself. I mapped out the route and had my GPS.
Got there in good time. Then drove around and around and around looking for the actual venue. I finally managed to find it. There were 10-15 parking spots. All taken. People had creatively made more spots by double and triple parking (effectively locking people in, because they were parked in non-spots). I thought I would run in and ask where people who were more familiar with the area would suggest parking.
I walked in to a stony silence. There were a couple of very small clusters of people chatting in hushed tones , the other people were standing in stony silence. I warbled something about being "quadruple parked" and got a couple of angry glares in response. If it weren't for the fact that I recognized ONE person (the volunteer coordinator) I might have thought I'd barged in on a wake which would have explained the lack of any smiles, joviality or holiday cheer. I asked if anyone had a suggestion of where to park and two people actually PHYSICALLY TURNED AWAY from me.
Now... if this were The Frozen Tundra, I would fully expect this sort of thing. Someone who OBVIOUSLY "wasn't from around here" comes into a party on The Frozen Tundra and they will be treated like something nasty people stepped in until or unless someone with clout introduces them. But here Just South of Nowhere, I've seen "strangers" and "foreigners" (Southern Code for "them damned Yankees") welcomed into social situations and I have received warm receptions myself in a room full of strangers. So, I have to confess that I was not at all ready for the cold shoulder I received.
And so, I turned around, walked out the door, went back to my car, got in and.... drove home. If I wanted to put up with that sort of bullshit attitude, I'd have stayed on The Frozen Tundra. Given the choice between sitting home alone and being somewhere that I am not welcome, I'll stay home.
So, the one party I was invited to this holiday season was a flat out bust. I return now to my previous bah humbugging. Precipitated in large part by the following... Last year (2010) around October, I started talking to my mom about spending Xmas with her this year and we were going to have The Girl come, too and we would all spend Xmas together. Well, things got sortve tossed "up in the air" when The Girl & The Wasband were getting kicked out of the place they were living on The Frozen Tundra and didn't know where they would be for the holidays and then MsPOSSLQ took the job he has now and so there was no one to watch the critters (can't leave chinchilla alone for more than an overnight..) so I had to bow out. So now The Girl and my Wasband have been invited to my Mom's for Xmas. (And I would have been totally cool with him being there if I'd been there, it's not like I hate him, I just didn't want to be married to him). And The Girl is 17 and will probably never want to do the "family Xmas" thing again. And yes, I am aware this is completely a "you made your bed and have to lie in it" situation but it's really making me hate the holidays even more than usual this year.
I'm still hoping for an awesome New Year's Eve party invitation. Not that I know anyone who is having an NYE party but I know me and I'll sit at home and listen to 'Same Old Lang Syne' on loop (I must have listened to that song a million times and it makes me cry EVERY DAMN TIME). And I already know that Santa can't bring me what I want...so... can it be January now?
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